Sunday May 1st 2011 – i need to be honest
It seems like we had a couple of weeks of “this could be it”. I, like many other girls, was getting swept up in the excitement. Meeting in different cities… late night talks.. texting all day… it’s been many, many moons since I have had that with a boy. I found myself wanting to let go of caution, and really give this a chance. Then something snapped into place…
Last night I had a long conversation with a good friend of mine about her current relationship. I advised her to be “honest” with the boy she is talking to. She has doubts about him. She feels he is always “bragging”, or telling stories to make her see how great he is. She also saw a picture of him and another girl standing a “took close” on Facebook.
In the months they have been “talking”, he and I have gotten to know each other. To me, he seems like the guy vying for her heart. He seems determined to treat her with respect, and show her, in as many ways as he can, that he feels something very special for her. But, you can’t quiet a girls doubts… they have to be addressed head on. I advised her to talk to him openly about how she feels when he is going on and on about how awesome he is. I advised her to ask him about the girl in the picture. I advised her to give herself a real chance with this boy…. to be honest.
Now that I was successful in dolling out relationship advice… I had to ask myself. Have I been honest? Am I really ok with all the other girls in the picture? Am I really ok with being asked to give up on the lifelong dream of being a mother? Am I really ok with the entire investigation into his life by homeland security? OR… was I falling into the pattern of “i’ve know him forever” , the pattern of “we grew up in the same community.. this would be perfect”. Am I still, like a little girl, looking to fulfill some childhood fantasy where the boy I marry and I were ogling at each other in Sunday school, and we are finally together?
I think we all know the answer here… honestly, Homie is not the one.
Ok good because I really think you’d be a great Mom!! And I know way too many women that made that sacrifice for a man and it didn’t end well for them. Proud of you!! Hang in there! Xoxoxoox
Comment by erica — May 2, 2011 @ 8:15 am
So…from what I remember you are in your mid-30s. Hardly qualifies you as an “Auntie”. STOP REFERRING TO GUYS AS “BOYS”! It’s irritating and it kind of speaks about how you are being a “little girl” when it comes to your thinking sometimes (ie this-could-be-the-one type of thinking).
If you see a guy as a boy, then your feminine instincts may be telling you something (this guy is really a boy). Start looking for men that will enhance your life, not detracting for it.
Comment by Streo777 — May 3, 2011 @ 2:09 pm